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Writer's pictureKyleen Joan

Why I Chose To Have A Small Circle When I Became A Mom

Updated: Feb 12, 2020

Having a lot of friends is overrated. I feel like most people like to have thousands of friends on Facebook and lots of friends in real life to appear popular. Lets face it, that's the least of my worries.


In my younger teenage years, I used to want to be friends with everyone, but that came with bullying and drama. Now at the age of 25, my circle is small and when I say small, I mean it.


My circle consists of my husband, a few good friends and my family. I wouldn't say I don't have friends, but what is a friend nowadays? Is a friend someone who comments on your social media posts, but never reaches out and wants to hang out? Is a friend someone who only messages you when they need something? Is a friend someone who only talks to you if YOU reach out? I guess you could call those people "friends", but not FRIENDS, if that makes sense. If you ask me if I have "friends", then yes, I have those, but if you ask me if I have FRIENDS, well, the answer is, yes one really good friend that I can count on.


Personally, I would rather have a few good friends or one great friend vs a bunch of so called "friends".


You need friends you can count on.

You need friends who will be there for you when you need someone to talk to.

You need friends who will check in on you.

You need friends who will invite you to do things.

You need friends who love your family as if they were their own.


Once I became pregnant, I realized who my true friends were and in reality, I realized who they were when I got married. After having my son, everyone disappeared. I am a stay at home mom and getting out to be with friends isn't a reality for me and if it is, well...its a rare occurrence and I feel like that is a main reason why my circle is small, but then again, I am a mom and most of the people I used to be friends with are not moms, so why would they want to hang with a mom when they can go to bars and get drunk?


Having a small circle since becoming a mom has been wonderful for me.

There isn't drama nor gossip within the group. We check in on each other. We invite each other to do things. We can count on each other. We love eachothers families as if they were our own.


Becoming a mom made me realize, I don't have time for the BS that comes with having friends.

I have my child, my husband and our myself to worry about.

I don't have time to please everyone.


My circle may be small, but the love is big.





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